The 10 things toddlers know best
2.Cheese is a whole food group. Toddlers will help you understand this.
3.The world can end when you are given the wrong animal cracker. It really fucking can.
4.Videos on dogs are better on the 50th watch than the first twenty.
5.The ecstasy filled joy of breastfeeding can be replaced with nothing else. Not even that expensive new toy you got them for your date night.
6.Mommies are both a wet-wipe and a handy snot rag. Maybe you used to wear nice looking clothing that fit well and you felt happy about. But now your toddler has helped you discover the joys of 3 day old yoga pants that used to be black and are now at best snot covered gray.
8. Crayons look pretty on new flooring. Sure, we moms think coloring books are where it's at for style but toddlers know that recently installed flooring and freshly painted walls are the real art-houses of their day.
9.If you pull your mom's nipple it will get her attention faster than saying hello. All breastfeeding moms know this logically but toddlers know this truth on a deep level of glee.
10. Ice cream is kept in the freezer. You parents out there might think this is common knowledge until you witness your toddler discover this magical truth and realize that even duct tape will not keep your fridge door shut now.